Sometimes it is not only the woman who is drying out. Sometimes, essential aspects of one’s micro-environment - the family, or the workplace, for instance - or one’s larger culture are caking and cracking to dust also, and these affect and afflict her. In order for her to return to her own skin, her own instinctual common sense, and her own return to home, are necessary. - p275, Women Who Run with the Wolves - Clarissa Pinkola Estes.
I hear the tap tap, click of the cat flap as it opens, then closes - his meow echoes through the slate-floored kitchen. He settles in the hallway - a crunch and crack of sharp teeth through tiny bones. I peer around the corner from the living room, into the dark corridor - a tiny creature lies on the floor; loomed over by black fur blending into the darkness. He peers back - radiant green eyes, meows at me as if to say ‘hi,’ then turns back to his hunter’s prey.
The close presence of this semi-wild-domesticated feline creature reminds me of that spark of wildness that lives in me, as I find the balance of listening and tending to my instinctive soul-self, while living and functioning in our modern society. A bit like this beautiful black cat who hunts for, then eats his live prey, followed later by a bowl of Whiskas and cat milk from a plastic bottle.
It’s why I like being in the company of animals - whether domesticated, wild or something in-between. Our non-human companions, especially cats, naturally live their wildness - they have their own unique intelligence, their own intuitive connection to environment and nature. Their spark of aliveness intact and pulsing strongly, more so than in their overly domesticated human friends. Living alongside or spending time in the company of animals, can help us to return ‘home’ into our own skin.
Just as our skin, our hair or our bodies can be dehydrated for a long time before we see the physical effects, the psyche and soul are no different. Dehydration happens over time and it’s not until we see the cracks appearing on the surface, that we realise we are gasping for moisture. Hydration to plump our cells, to feed our brains, to blossom our being.
The drying out of psyche and soul is a slow withering process, like a grape turning into a raisin or a loaf of bread overbaked until rigid. Overextension, over-stimulation, over-giving, trying too hard; there are many ways that the instinctual soul-self that lives in us can wither and deplete. And often, particularly in these times, as Estes says, it can be our larger culture that contributes to us turning to dust.
But! There are many ways to re-hydrate after a period of drought. To find our way back home by replenishing from the inside out.
If you’re feeling a bit dried out in psyche or soul, if anxiety is your familiar friend, you’re likely in need of some deep moisture. The kind that penetrates cells to the centre. Here are some of the ways I’ve found moisture to plump up my instinctive soul-self:
7 Ways to Re-hydrate when your Soul-Self is Drying Out
Observe babies and small children - whether your own, your friends or kiddies you see out and about. Remember that was once you. A baby in his highchair beams me a toothy smile - his bulbous cheeks, soft and peachy-pink, his knowing, innocent eyes reaching to connect, to feel me; high-pitched squeals pierce my ears but I’m smiling inside. Sat next to seven babies in highchairs, mothers chatting over coffee. Cake crumbs are slapped and mashed into surfaces, podgy legs bouncing, jiggling, chubby fingers grabbing - voices true and free. These little wild and natural, uninhibited love bundles gather, creating a warm, slightly crazy, uplifting ambiance.
Wild Swimming - skin bare, feeling the elements - heat, sudden cold, sun and wind waking dormant energy - dive and dip in the sea - play in the waves, immerse in a river.
Seek out animal companions, let them come close, engage, connect and respect. Visit a friend with a pet, do some cat or dog-sitting, try equine therapy.
Nourish in nature - forest bathe. Listen to the sounds of creatures moving in the overgrown shrubs, plant a bird feeder in your garden and quietly watch - breathe deeply and mindfully, sit on earth and soak in sustenance.
Sing - join a choir, sing in nature, sing with friends - let your voice come out and weave with the wind, sing with the sound of the sea.
Write - journal your thoughts and feelings, observe life - write what you see now.
Moontime - on your next period - rest, float, dream - give space to just be and wait for the natural rising of energy as your period ends before ‘doing’ (obviously not always possible, yet necessary when re-hydration is needed).
What ways do you hydrate your instinctive soul-self?
Feel welcome to share your personal ways to resource in the comments section.
May you find deep moisture in life-giving ways this week.
Jane x
PS: I’m writing a bit less on Substack at the moment as I focus my energy on the development of other related projects. I imagine I’ll write about once a month while in this phase, and perhaps more if inspiration arises!